A cop pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, ” I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.” The driver says, “Well officer I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.” Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: “Now don’t be silly dear, you know [...]

Construction worker on the 5th floor of a building needed a handsaw. So he spots another worker on the ground floor and yells down to him, but he can’t hear him. So the worker on the 5th floor tries sign language. He pointed to his eye meaning “I”, pointed to his knee meaning “need”, then [...]

One morning a woman was walking out of her front door, when she notices a strange little man at the bottom of her garden. “You’re a goblin,” she says, “I caught you and you owe me three wishes!”. So the goblin replies “OK, you caught me fair and square, what’s your first wish?”. The woman [...]

One of the things I love to do is to read jokes. This joke, I wasn’t sure if I was going to post until I a read the ending! Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency? Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner. Dispatcher: Do you have an [...]